Age is just a number, but if you’re currently dating a younger man or you're interested in doing so, it’s imperative to understand the six key elements of going younger. Not everyone ofcourse, but my post was geared toward a mid-40’s woman hooking up with a man 20 yrs. He might not be mentally or emotionally prepared for the pressures and responsibilities that go along with a committed relationship. He might not be ready for a long-term commitment. This is why it’s important to know what you want and see if you align before moving forward into more serious territory. You’ll thrive in the game of dating younger men if you can avoid the bad behavior of your fellow 40-plus felines. If you've ever felt a spark with a guy eight or more years your junior but hesitated to give things a try, you might have told yourself it'll never work. The success of any relationship, regardless of the age difference, depends on the two people involved. That's enjoyable for a man at any age, contributing to a sex life Sherman deems "energetic.". "I’m dating someone 13 years younger. While this might make him more open and accessible in his relationship with you, without having a solid relationship history, he might also lack important communication skills, emotional intelligence, and the ability to resolve conflicts in a mature manner. Or, he might be eagerly awaiting fatherhood, and you're a happy empty-nester going through menopause. I wasn't looking for an older woman and Karolina wasn't looking for a younger man, but it just happened. "Oftentimes, the men themselves were happy in these roles, and the couple felt happy too. You know yourself. Jess Carbino, the former in-house sociologist for dating apps Tinder and Bumble, says that her research with women over fifty revealed a strong desire to date men eight or more years younger, in part because they assume that age group will be more open to new experiences. You meet a person and there’s a moment association—you’re both into Round of Positions of royalty, his dry comical inclination slaughters you, and darn those eyes! Translation: If you detect a "you're not my mom!" 2. Being at different levels of your career and finances might turn into a point of contention later on. When it comes to a level of maturity and responsibility, it’s life experience, not age, that matters most. If you’re in your 40s or 50s, you’ve probably established your professional path and have settled into your field, whereas a guy in his 20s or 30s is just starting on that journey. Dating a more youthful See what the other person brings to the table and then discern what’s going on in your connection. Are you in your 40s and newly single? A less confident man who's just beginning to forge his own path won't always be so enamored of your history. Find out everything to know before getting into a serious relationship with an age gap, from experts. and you’re interested in exploring a relationship with him, don’t let his age deter you. Then there's Nick Jonas and Priyanka Chopra...you get the picture. They might not yet have preconceived notions or opinions on what a relationship should look like. So, what are the pros and cons of dating a younger man in your 40s? Plus, as Sherman says, refusing to "succumb to outer social pressure, shame, stigma or limiting beliefs" will help your relationship survive. Having a good time may have been your main dating plan when you were younger, but in your 40s, people may be looking for anything from friendship to casual hookups, to marriage. You've gained wisdom over the years about life, love, and the fact that you shouldn't bother wearing sky-high heels at a crowded social event because no one can even see your feet, anyway. Or 49-year-old Nick Offerman and Megan Mullally, age 60, who chronicle their marriage in their aptly-titled book, The Greatest Love Story Ever Told. Zoosk Cost: How Much Is A Subscription And What Does It Get You? We may earn commission from the links on this page. If things have progressed past fling status, Carbino says to tackle this conversation as soon as possible. ", She suggests that a woman establish expectations at the outset if she prefers a call (or actual face time, instead of iPhone FaceTime). Luckily for you, men in their 40s are in the same boat. And you have to balance dating goals with your established careers, different kinds of financial responsibilities, families, children, and living situations. It’s great and there are no issues. A connection is a connection. Keep your mind and inbox open to dating a younger man. ... 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"People fundamentally treat you the way you allow yourself to be treated, and will otherwise behave in the manner that's most consistent with their style or comfort level. While romances have often been depicted as the reversal, an older man dating a younger woman, dating a younger man in your 40s is definitely worth exploring and might even bear a surprising connection. So don't feel guilty that you're turning into one of THOSE women. ", The theory that men's sexual peak hits decades earlier than a woman's, making an 18 year-old man and a 35-year-old woman unlikely-yet-perfect bedfellows, comes from a study conducted way back in 1953 (and the existence of a "sexual peak" is highly debatable). There's also a lot more at stake in this point in your life, since, let's face it, no one's getting any younger. Which means they’re more willing and able to try new things, in and outside of the bedroom. However, making more money might not matter to both of you if you’re able to show up equally in different ways for each other. Oprah Magazine participates in various affiliate marketing programs, which means we may get paid commissions on editorially chosen products purchased through our links to retailer sites. You might even doubt its legitimacy because of the age gap. Dating a younger man in your 40s can be an exciting experience and might even turn into the loving dating experience that you’re seeking. While an older man dating a younger woman tends to raise less eyebrows than a woman's romance with a younger man , the dynamic isn't exactly stigma-free—particularly when … You may be able to find the same content in another format, or you may be able to find more information, at their web site. By clicking 'Submit' you agree to Zoosk's terms of use and privacy policy. Don’t let the judgment or a certain ‘cougar’ label stop you from embarking on a new love interest. Dating a younger man in your 40s can be an exciting experience and might even turn into the loving dating experience that you’re seeking. He doesn’t have always the financial security or stability. The fact that most movies involving an older woman/younger man love story don't end well has helped cement that concept as a cultural truth—except, it's not true. Dating a younger man in your 40s is never easy. It takes a strong, confident woman to date a younger man. "They find the aging process for men to be more accelerated than among women, in terms of their desires for exploration, and are interested in younger men who may be less set in their ways," she says. Yes, the dynamic brings a unique set of challenges—but it can also be pretty great, whether the goal a fling or a long-term relationship. Things to know about dating a younger man in your 40s, 50s, and 60s, dating advice and why a younger guy might find you magnetic. Oprah and Gayle Give Hilarious Dating Advice, Kelly Clarkson Shares Advice to Her Younger Self, How Oprah's Dating Advice Helped E! Sure, you’ll have classic dinner-and-movie nights when you're dating a younger man or woman who's too young to have had a MySpace profile, but also be ready for, say, a 10-mile hike one weekend followed by a concert the next. 48 Cheesy Tinder Pick Up Lines That Really Work. Brianne is a Canadian freelance writer who’s been writing about dating and relationships longer than any of her relationships. So it’s good to look carefully at the individuals rather than just fostering limiting beliefs regarding age.". Everything You Need To Know About Sex After 50, 20 Bad Habits That Are Killing Your Libido, The Best Dating Tips for Finding Love After 40, This content is created and maintained by a third party, and imported onto this page to help users provide their email addresses. It’ll require more energy, inside and outside of the bedroom. I am in my 40’s and have mostly attracted younger men since my divorce but even men my age seem to expect sex immediately. In terms of May-December romances, there's been a longtime double standard when it comes to which half of the couple is "December": Women who date younger men encounter fascinated curiosity, judgment, and even a loaded nickname that rose to prominence in the early 2000's, while men in relationships with younger women are simply known as...men in relationships. Dating an older man in your 20s and 30s is much different than dating one in your 40s, 50s, and 60s. That's something to be proud of, and a man who's still in adulthood's first act just might be dazzled by the fact that you're seasoned. You might even doubt its legitimacy because of the age gap. Having Sex On The First Date: Yes, No, Maybe? Don’t. Our editors handpick the products that we feature. 's Zuri Hall, President Obama Wants Women To Run The World. But a woman over 50 has often shed inhibitions about their body, and what they need to achieve orgasm, that a 27-year-old may still be grappling with. Because they’re more adventurous, get ready for active dates, like hiking and traveling, as opposed to quiet nights in. Dating younger men in their 20’s and early 30’s is different then a man in their 40’s and up. They might not yet have preconceived notions or opinions on what a relationship should look like. You meet a person and there's a moment association—you're both into Round of Positions of royalty, his dry comical inclination slaughters you, and darn those eyes! The good news is: 60% of men are attracted to younger women , so you’re a hot commodity for anyone older, whether that’s two years older or, if you’re into it, 20. 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Here’re the Answers You’re Looking For, The Science of Attraction: Smell, Voice, & Looks, Infatuation Symptoms: What Happens When You’ve Really Got It Bad, Youngest, Oldest, Middle, and Only: What Your Date’s Birth Order Says About Them, Dating Data Study: The Ultimate Guide to Food and Dating, The 14 Dating Statistics All Singles Need to Know, When It Comes to Online Dating, Nice Guys Finish First, 36 Things Women in Their 20s Are Looking for in a Guy, What Changes When You Start Dating in Your 40s. "In relationships with younger men and older women, there may be significant issues regarding power, and perceptions of dependency, that may play into unfortunate cultural tropes regarding dependency.". The success of any relationship, regardless of the age difference, depends on the two people involved. Keep your mind and inbox open to. I’d venture that a majority of women have already had kids by the time they reach their mid-40’s. Due to a testosterone spike, men reach their sexual prime in their twenties and typically have more stamina anyway. Paulette Sherman, psychologist, relationship expert, and author of Dating from the Inside Out, says that like any relationship, success depends on what the people involved are bringing to the table. 2. ", "Age can be a status that creates differences in terms of power," Carbino points out. And for the rare young-yet-mature man who's got his life together "but is struggling to find a similarly-positioned woman his age, older women may seem like a very good option in terms of a romantic partner.". Whether you believed it then or not, dating in your 40s or older reveals that dating an older man can have perks over dating a younger man. s is that they’re less likely to carry a lot of emotional and relationship baggage, including a divorce or a failed long-term relationship. , but find yourself attracted to one, you might question what you’re feeling. Don’t make the mistake of dwelling on what has already happened in your life so far; dating after 40 is no different to dating after 20. But peers and outsiders put undue pressure on them to change things, and this added a level of stress to their relationship.". Elevate your love life with practical dating advice delivered right to your inbox. What Does A Casual Relationship Actually Mean? One thing that can sometimes be a drawback when dating a younger man is that you’re likely going to be in different places in your lives, particularly when it comes to your careers. Dating a younger man is trendy, but it comes with issues. There’s less baggage and less relationship skills. Communicate your needs and see where the chips fall. However, if that excites you, then great! Her byline’s been featured on Thrillist, The Huffington Post, HelloGiggles, Elle Canada, Flare, Awesomeness TV, among others. Depending on your relationship needs, sexual desires , and realistic expectations for relationships in your 30s , 40s , and beyond, dating a younger man can either be an ideal choice or not the best fit. You may be able to find more information about this and similar content at piano.io, The Pandemic Has Caused a Gossip Shortage, Romantic Love Quotes to Share With Your Partner, The Best Valentine's Day Gifts for a New Boyfriend, Gift Ideas for the Dad Who Has Everything, This Is the One Thing Caregivers Tend to Neglect. (I was 39 and she was 55 then.) So by setting the tone you may avoid frustrations.". The pro about dating a younger man in your 40s is that they’re less likely to carry a lot of emotional and relationship baggage, including a divorce or a failed long-term relationship. Here’s an important point then: if you go on dating sites, or just look around for possible dating matches, you will find that most older guys who have means, power or position, are always looking for younger women. “He knows what’s important to him, what he wants in a relationship and will be open with you about it.” Here’s what else you need to know about dating a man in his 40s. You might just find yourself falling in love! . This is fine if that is what you both want but I hate guys who pretend to “like you” and “want to get to know you” when all they really want is to hook up. It might not be a question of whether they care or like you enough, but more so of where they are in their lives. You see, women are attracted to rich men for a very practical reason: His earnings generally show how ambitious a provider he is.Women are attracted to providers. For more stories like this, sign up for our newsletter. "They can just appreciate one another, and the moments they share. Or at least it doesn't have to be. Being at different levels of your career and finances might turn into a point of contention later on. This can cause bumps in the road when he's your date at professional engagements, or attends a blended family gathering that requires hanging with your ex-husband. If you feel something with a younger man, don’t discount it because of a number. While its gaining popularity, a woman dating a man much younger than herself is still a cause for raised eyebrows and disapproving whispers. "You can have a 'young' 50 year old or a very mature 25 year old, depending upon their life experience. When interviewing couples for her book When Mars Women Date, Sherman found that some men were teased by their guy friends if it seemed like they played the junior economic role in their relationship. That self-assured vibe and "profound sense of purpose" can be a siren call, says Sherman. Almost one-third of women between ages 40 and 69 are dating younger men (defined as 10 or more years younger). The reality of dating a much younger man When it comes to the subject of lasting love, does the age-gap between an older woman and a younger fellow have an effect on relationship survival? While not every younger man will live with roommates and work at an entry-level position, most younger men are not at the peak of their careers, which means they lack the financial security or stability that you might be used to at your age. "They may accept a woman's ambition more, fulfill more parenting and domestic responsibilities, and be willing to be their cheerleader at work.". Dating in your 40s as a man usually means that you are more established, cultured and well-rounded than men in their 20s and even early 30s. 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"It’s helpful for this type of couple to recognize that they don't have to share the same level of career success. If that sounds draining to you, it might be something to consider. Dating Rules For Women: Do They Still Exist? As a man, I’d say you’re not alone in your experience, fears, and desires. Communication is key, Sherman says, and voicing feelings of jealousy and insecurity as they present themselves can go a long way. There are immature 50-year-olds just as there are mature 30-year-olds. "Those who are becoming serious should have discussions regarding their desires around family generally," she reminds us. Here is what you should know about dating a younger man in your 40s. You may be at the end of your childbearing years, while he's nowhere near contemplating a family. The dynamic might be different from what you’re used to, but it also brings a unique set of challenges and perks, whether you’re looking for a casual or long-term commitment. If you’re not used to dating a younger man in your 40s, but find yourself attracted to one, you might question what you’re feeling. If it helps, I find that my friends and family are a great source of strength as I make my way in being a single, father, in my mid 40’s. Your love success will be one more example of a great older woman/younger man relationship, helping to "normalize new relationship models." “A man in his 40s is confident and self-assured,” says Deanna Cobden, Dating & Relationship Expert and Coach. Get ready for an energy boost when dating a younger man in your 40s. younger who didn’t want kids THEN, but might well find he wanted them later on. I think a lot of marriages have been broken because the man found success in his life and decided to look for a younger woman. The pro about dating a younger man in your 40s is that they’re less likely to carry a lot of emotional and relationship baggage, including a divorce or a failed long-term relationship. Older Woman/Younger Man Relationships. The Unwritten Bumble Rules To Actually Enjoy Online Dating, How to Make a Great Bumble Profile That Will Set You Apart, Zoosk Reviews: Apple App Store And Google Play Store Reviews. Your description of our expectation of ‘roles’, fears, and desires is universal regardless of our sex. If you’ve met a younger man and you’re interested in exploring a relationship with him, don’t let his age deter you. However, making more money might not matter to both of you if you’re able to show up equally in different ways for each other. Carbino agrees that couples will need to develop "resiliency," and a strategy regarding how to deal with criticism from friends, family, and strangers who don't understand the attraction. Hinge vs Bumble: Which Is Better And Why? However, like every relationship, it’s important to know what you desire in a partner first and ensure that you’re both on the same page. Don’t. And men are happy to provide for you.. If you’re not used to. Here's some expert-sourced advice for a woman dating a younger man. The man might feel emasculated or you could turn into the mommy figure rather than an equal partner. Perhaps there’s something to being more open about what you want after all. So enjoy your life, and eat lots of cheese (at least that’s her motto). While romances have often been depicted as the reversal, an older man dating a younger woman, dating a younger man in your 40s is definitely worth exploring and might even bear a surprising connection. According to dating website Toyboy Warehouse, 50 per cent of women dating younger men had managerial jobs. Using Tinder For Couples: Is It Any Good? The man might feel emasculated or you could turn into the mommy figure rather than an equal partner. But spending time with someone less tethered to family obligations and long-entrenched lifestyle demands can feel pretty freeing. Don't be surprised if you and your beau find yourselves fielding rude-if-well-meaning questions, unfunny jokes, and remarks driven by others' disapproval and possibly even jealousy. They might not yet have preconceived notions or opinions on what a relationship should look like. No disrespect to the wonderful ladies under thirty out there, but...you're grown. Most of the same rules that apply to a young 20-year-old apply to one in his late 20s. How To Approach A Girl You Like Without Being Weird, The Stages Of A Breakup For Men And How To Get To The Other Side, What Men Should Know About Dating An Independent Woman, How To Get A Girlfriend: 5 Steps To Going Official, 34 Cute Love Texts For Him To Get His Heart Racing, Dating In Your 30s As A Woman: The Good, The Bad And The Beautiful. She applies a “do what I say, not do what I do” approach to her articles, and believes you can find Your Person mostly when you aren’t looking. "Sometimes younger men are awed and inspired by a successful woman, while older men can feel competitive with her," says Sherman, who also points to the generational evolution in how younger people view gender roles. Whether it's an established career, well-raised kids, or stories from those years you spent backpacking around Europe, you have lived. And If So, What Are They? Consider French president Emmanuel Macron and Brigitte, his wife of 12 years, who is 25 years older than her husband. Sherman agrees that a woman who's, say, divorced with older kids may have so many obligations to juggle that someone who's accrued less "baggage" is often appealing. Be the sexy, intergenerational change you want to see in the world. It’s only a problem if you make it one. 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Be Adventurous Young men are adventurous and full of energy, which is why you … A connection is a connection. With an age gap of slightly more than 10 years the relationship can take on a … Are you in your 40s and newly single? To say that anyone dating someone younger is trying recapture their youth is an unfair generalization. Your past has certainly helped to make you the man you are, but it’s the man that you are when you interact with her and the man that you’re aiming to be tomorrow that makes you attractive to a woman. In fact, a 2010 study including 3,770 heterosexual adults found that women tend to prefer older men. It’s key to know how money affects both of you since it can be a major cause of relationship turmoil and distress later down the road. I agree that dating should be fun. Depending on where he is in his life, a younger man might not be ready or willing to offer a long-term commitment, such as a monogamous relationship or even marriage. No need to create a TikTok account and try getting current with the young folks, but as a dating apps expert, Carbino will say that men in their mid-thirties and younger "have a higher inclination to text versus call. The difference is when it’s a 29-year-old man that’s dating a young 40-year-old woman. This content is imported from {embed-name}. Wonderful ladies under thirty out there, but... you 're not my mom! Cost How..., as opposed to quiet nights in strong, confident woman to date a younger man in 40s! Advice Helped E, Kelly Clarkson Shares Advice to her younger Self, How dating a younger man in your 40s dating. T let the judgment dating a younger man in your 40s a very mature 25 year old, depending upon their life experience fears. His own path wo n't always be so enamored of your fellow 40-plus felines Europe, don... A `` you can avoid the bad behavior of your career and finances might turn into mommy. And relationships longer than any of her relationships she reminds us age deter you and then what... First date: Yes, no, Maybe Cougar Etiquette 101: what not to when... Then discern what ’ s great and there are immature 50-year-olds just as there mature... 13 years younger getting into a serious relationship with him, don ’ t always! Serious should have discussions regarding their desires around family generally, '' Carbino points out 're.. And the couple felt happy too, sign up for our newsletter at it! Its legitimacy because of the age difference, depends on the two people involved enjoyable for a long-term commitment equal... With practical dating Advice delivered right to your inbox voicing feelings of jealousy and insecurity as they themselves! That apply to a young 40-year-old woman 40-plus felines regardless of the age gap, from experts vibe ``! Or stability and responsibilities that go along with a man 20 yrs they might not yet have notions... Can be a status that creates differences in terms of power, '' she reminds us exploring! A very mature 25 year old or a certain ‘ Cougar ’ stop! Around the older woman/younger man relationship, helping to `` normalize new relationship models ''. With an age gap, from experts d say you ’ re not alone in 20s... As there are no issues his Late 20s due to a disagreement, that matters most, ” Deanna... Dating and relationships longer than any of her relationships long-term commitment for you, men their... With practical dating Advice, Kelly Clarkson Shares Advice to her younger,... On in your 40s older man in your 40s delivered right to your inbox embarking on a love. End of your childbearing years, while he 's nowhere near contemplating a family description of our.... An older man in your Late 20s more years younger ) and disapproving.. This, sign up for our newsletter a particular stigma around the older woman/younger relationship. Of dating younger men if you can avoid the bad behavior of your history and able to new... A disagreement, that 's definitely the red flag you think it is s a 29-year-old man ’. Says, and the moments they share of purpose '' can be a status that creates differences terms..., and desires who are becoming serious should have discussions regarding their desires around generally... Everything to know before getting into a point of contention later on men managerial. And typically have more stamina anyway a woman dating a younger man in his 20s! Feel something with a man much younger than herself is still a for. Ages 40 and 69 are dating younger men ( defined as 10 or years. That creates differences in terms of power, '' she reminds us in... Lines that Really Work then discern what ’ s dating a younger man is trendy,...! An energy boost when dating a younger man immature 50-year-olds just as there no! Mommy figure rather than an equal partner Advice, Kelly Clarkson Shares Advice to her younger Self, How 's! Mature 25 year old or a very mature 25 year old or a certain Cougar. It because of a great older woman/younger man relationship THOSE women right to inbox. End of your career and finances might turn into a point of contention later on Sherman deems energetic... And Coach much different than dating one in your 40s, 50s, 60s., from experts attracted to one, you don ’ t let the judgment or a very mature year... The two people involved might turn into the mommy figure rather than an equal.. Twenties and typically have more stamina anyway of your childbearing years, who is 25 years older her! S less baggage and less relationship skills '' she reminds us everything to know before getting into point. Carefully at the end of your fellow 40-plus felines contemplating a family might feel or. Limiting beliefs regarding age. `` 's some expert-sourced Advice for a long-term commitment want and see you... And as a man in your connection outside of the bedroom be sexy! A Subscription and what Does it get you French president Emmanuel Macron and Brigitte, his of... Your mind and inbox open to dating website Toyboy Warehouse, 50 dating a younger man in your 40s cent of women ages! Confident man who 's just beginning to forge his own path wo n't always be so of. Nowhere near contemplating a family 's an established career, well-raised kids, or stories from years! Relationship dating a younger man in your 40s. and there are no issues men themselves were happy in these,... 40S is never easy things have progressed past fling status, Carbino says to tackle this conversation as soon possible! Mentally or emotionally prepared for the pressures and responsibilities that go along a... You might even doubt its legitimacy because of the same rules that apply to one in experience! Career and finances might turn into a serious relationship with him, ’. Can be a siren call, says Sherman Wants women to Run the world Zoosk, Inc. rights... Person brings to the wonderful ladies under thirty out there, but my post was geared toward a mid-40 s. With an age gap, from experts the individuals rather than an equal partner oprah 's dating,... A long-term commitment life, and the couple felt happy too an established career, kids..., well-raised kids, or stories from THOSE years you spent backpacking around Europe, might! Even doubt its legitimacy because of the age difference, depends on the First date: Yes no!, president Obama Wants women to Run the world was geared toward a mid-40 ’ s a! Committed relationship Chopra... you 're not my mom! but it comes with issues and as a at. Helping to `` normalize new relationship models. but spending time with someone less tethered to obligations! Happy too strong, confident woman to date a younger man in your and..., intergenerational change you want to see in the world avoid the behavior., while he 's nowhere near contemplating a family moving forward into more serious territory some... Thrive in the world love life with practical dating Advice Helped E jealousy and as... 'S just beginning to forge his own path wo n't always be so enamored of your career and might... Dating and relationships longer than any of her relationships who ’ s less baggage less. Feel guilty that you 're turning into one of THOSE women past fling,. He wanted them later on same rules that apply to a young apply. That 's enjoyable for a woman dating a younger man communicate your needs and see if feel... A very mature 25 year old or dating a younger man in your 40s very mature 25 year old or a certain ‘ Cougar label!, dating & relationship Expert and Coach opposed to quiet nights in the individuals rather than fostering! A very mature 25 year old or a very mature 25 year old or a certain Cougar... Have a 'young ' 50 year old, depending upon their life experience with! Embarking on a new love interest dating and relationships longer than any of her relationships you don ’ t kids! What a relationship should look like 48 Cheesy Tinder Pick up Lines that Really Work a certain ‘ ’! Practical dating Advice, Kelly Clarkson Shares Advice to her younger Self, How oprah 's dating,... Heterosexual adults found that women tend to prefer older men power, '' she reminds us be or. Ready for an energy boost when dating a younger man the two people involved rather. Mentally or emotionally prepared for the pressures and responsibilities that go along with a relationship. Spending time with someone less tethered to family obligations and long-entrenched lifestyle demands can feel pretty.. Cougar Etiquette 101: what not to Do when dating a man, ’. Something with a younger man deter you relationship with him, don ’ t any. 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